Chapter 3: "Sun-Powered Super-Dude vs. Ramen-Powered Ninja"
(In which Naruto watches immortal-tier flexing, contemplates existence, and very briefly considers becoming solar-powered.)
Naruto Uzumaki had seen some wild things in his life.
He'd seen giant toads summon themselves mid-air, snakes the size of castles slither out of cursed seal tattoos, and an old man turn into a tree god. He'd fought men who could raise whole cities and ghosts who wore orange masks like fashion statements.
But nothing—and he meant nothing—could have prepared him for Superman's highlight reel.
"Okay," Naruto said, arms crossed. "Let's see what you got."
He expected strength, sure. The guy looked like a brick wall with good hair. But what he didn't expect was… planetary deadlifts.
The first image that floated in Zatanna's glowing magical screen was Clark Kent holding up the Earth. The Earth. Like he'd just walked into the gym, warmed up with a few pushups, and decided to hold the planet over his head for five days straight.
"Is this a metaphor?" Naruto asked, blinking.
"Nope," Kara answered brightly. "That really happened."
Naruto's expression twitched. "But… physics?"
Zatanna smirked. "You'll find those are more like… loose guidelines in our universe."
Naruto watched as Superman zipped through space faster than his brain could register, bending around solar flares like he was playing intergalactic dodgeball.
"Is that a galaxy? He passed a galaxy?"
"Yes," Clark said, very casually. "I was in a hurry."
Then came the punch. The punch that launched a man from Earth to the moon. With one arm. While barely squinting.
"And that guy lived?" Naruto asked.
"Define 'lived,'" Kara muttered.
And finally, the black hole.
That should've been it. The moment Naruto's brain officially retired. Because nothing says "ridiculously overpowered" like shrugging off a black hole. Clark had emerged from it like he'd walked through a mild windstorm.
The screen faded. Silence settled over the room.
Naruto just stood there, mouth slightly open, brain rebooting like a lagging toad scroll.
"So…" he said slowly, trying very hard not to sound bitter, "you were born under a yellow sun, and now you're basically an immortal mountain with laser eyes?"
Clark scratched the back of his neck, almost sheepish. "Well… I like to think I'm more than just my powers."
Naruto blinked. "Yeah. That's exactly what someone who survives black holes would say."
He took a step back and squinted at the man of steel like he was an art piece labeled 'Solar-Powered Nonsense, Circa Forever.'
Kara elbowed Zatanna and whispered, "Think he's okay?"
Zatanna chuckled. "I think he's going through the five stages of Superman."
And Naruto was—he just hit Stage Four: Existential Despair.
"So all of that… all that insane strength… you didn't train for it? You just got it because of sunlight?!"
Clark raised his hands. "I mean… I did train. But yes, my biology does most of the work."
Naruto threw his hands in the air. "That's so unfair! I spent years learning to control a demon fox, master wind release, dodge death at least fifteen times before breakfast—and you just tan and lift moons for breakfast?!"
Kara tried really hard not to laugh.
Zatanna didn't even try.
Naruto huffed and crossed his arms like a disgruntled cat. "So if I just lay on a beach long enough, I'll punch people to the moon too?"
"Only if you're Kryptonian," Clark replied with a smile.
Naruto muttered something under his breath that sounded a lot like "stupid alien genetics."
But then, after a moment of pouting and internal dramatic monologuing, he calmed down.
Because yes—it was unfair.
But that didn't mean it wasn't cool.
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Most people, after watching Superman tank a black hole like it was a gentle breeze, would either cry, pass out, or begin questioning the entire purpose of upper body strength.
Naruto Uzumaki?
He grinned.
Because somewhere between the absurd planet-lifting montage and the moon-punching nonsense, a tiny lightbulb flickered in the back of his brain—and Naruto, being Naruto, immediately tried to rip the switch off the wall.
"If Superman draws power from the sun…"
"And I draw power from nature…"
"THEN I TOO CAN BECOME A WALKING DEITY OF DESTRUCTION."
Okay, maybe not exactly that phrasing, but it was close enough.
His eyes widened. Not out of fear. Out of sheer possibility. If this world had energy radiating from its stars, its atmosphere, its very cosmos… then why limit himself to Earth's natural energy? Why not go bigger? Broader?
Galactic Sage Mode, anyone?
Sure, he didn't have a PhD in interdimensional metaphysics or whatever nonsense Zatanna and Batman would argue about in a coffee shop—but he had guts. And guts, as every ninja knew, were way more reliable than equations.
Naruto spun on his heel and faced Superman, his expression somewhere between awe and "I just invented the ultimate jutsu in my head and I need a snack."
He jabbed a finger toward Clark. "You are the strongest person I've ever seen. Like—by a mile. I don't even have a unit of measurement for how strong you are."
Clark, who had been expecting mild horror or worship, was caught off guard by the compliment. "Uh… thank you?"
Naruto walked up, all wide-eyed and grinning like someone who'd just found a new training scroll labeled 'How To Be a Demi-Immortal in 10 Days.'
He raised a fist.
Clark blinked.
"You're cool in my books," Naruto said.
It was such a Naruto thing to say. No fear. No shame. Just genuine admiration and the willingness to punch a mountain tomorrow if it meant catching up.
Clark couldn't help but smile. He bumped the offered fist, and the knuckles made a satisfying thunk.
"You're in my good books too."
From the sidelines, Kara watched with arms folded, her expression somewhere between amused older sister and proud teacher.
Zatanna leaned toward her and whispered, "He's going to be trouble, isn't he?"
"Oh, definitely," Kara replied. "But the good kind."
Naruto's mind, meanwhile, was already off somewhere else—calculating how much natural energy he could absorb if he meditated on top of a satellite during a solar flare. Because if Superman could bench press gravity, then Sage Mode was due for a major cosmic upgrade.
Maybe he'd call it Solar Sage Mode. Or Space Sage Style: Cosmic Rasengan Boom.
He liked that last one.
"Kyuubi," he said mentally, "we're gonna train until the moon explodes."
Kurama groaned. "Why do I feel like this world is going to regret letting you live?"
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When Zatanna conjured the swirling blue portal and told Naruto to "go wild," there were at least three possible outcomes:
He'd throw a few cool jutsu.
He'd blow up a small forest.
He'd accidentally break gravity.
Thankfully, it was only the second-most destructive outcome. A win for containment zones everywhere.
They stepped through the portal onto a wasteland so empty it could've been a deleted level from a video game. It stretched for miles in every direction—barren, silent, and reinforced with more wards than a paranoid sorcerer's diary.
"Naruto, go wild," Kara said, giving him a friendly shove like she'd just dared him to cannonball into a volcano.
"Destroy whatever you want," she added, like it was no big deal.
Naruto blinked. "Are you… sure?" His voice had that specific 'you've just handed me the big red button' tone.
Zatanna smirked, arms folded. "Go for it. Just let us know if you plan on busting the planet."
"Funny," Naruto snorted.
Then he vanished.
No jutsu flash. No dramatic shout. Just—gone.
Clark's eyes tracked him instantly, but the rest of the group saw only a golden-orange blur bolting across the desert like a sentient thunderclap.
Naruto didn't start small.
He reached a mountain the size of a skyscraper in under a second, reared back his fist, and punched. The kind of punch that made the Earth shudder like it just remembered it had anxiety.
The entire mountain exploded, splintering into a billion dusty fragments. The shockwave kicked up a windstorm that nearly knocked Zatanna's hat off.
"Okay," Kara said, brushing debris out of her hair. "He's definitely not from Kansas."
Next came the kunai. Not regular ones—oh no, these were chakra-enhanced, wind-laced throwing knives of doom. He whipped them out mid-air and threw.
Each one streaked like a missile, slicing through solid rock like it owed him money.
Then the Rasengan happened.
Naruto summoned a shadow clone, whispered something that probably translated to "let's melt a continent," and together they formed a Rasengan the size of a house. A two-story one.
They dove, spinning, glowing, hurling toward the next mountain like the world's deadliest Beyblade.
BOOM.
The mountain didn't crumble. It ceased to exist.
When the dust finally settled, Naruto dropped lightly onto the cracked earth, calm as a monk, breathing in slow, steady rhythms. His hands still glowed faintly from the residual chakra.
He turned back toward the group and gave a casual shrug.
"That good enough?"
Clark Kent, a.k.a. Superman, smiled.
It wasn't a condescending good job, kid smile.
It was the kind of smile you give when someone punches a hole through a mountain range and then stands there like they just finished doing their laundry.
"That was good," he said, nodding. "Thank you for the demonstration."
What Naruto didn't know was that Clark had been analyzing everything—speed, form, precision, energy output, and adaptability. He didn't just watch Naruto's attacks; he saw through them.
And what he saw?
A warrior.
Not just powerful, but disciplined. Not just fast, but tactical. Not just raw force, but years of experience. Each move Naruto made had intent—efficiency baked into every strike, every leap, every flick of a kunai.
Clark's internal Kryptonian scanner clocked Naruto at Mach 100 even without any transformation. That alone made him faster than most metahumans. Combined with chakra-enhanced durability, agility, and whatever eldritch nonsense powered that giant glowing sphere, Naruto was easily in the top tier of global threats—well, global assets, Clark corrected mentally.
Clark's electromagnetic aura would still dampen most of Naruto's attacks, and he knew that. But there was something else inside the boy—something older, deeper. Not chakra. Not mere physical might. But spirituality. Intent.
Magic.
And magic, Clark knew from experience, didn't play by physics.
Naruto grinned, looking perfectly at home in a field of craters and broken hills. He didn't seem discouraged that Clark and Kara still outclassed him. He wasn't sulking or measuring power levels like a numbers game.
He was excited.
Excited to learn. Excited to grow. Excited to surpass everything.
Clark recognized that fire. He'd seen it before. In Bruce. In Diana. Even in young Billy Batson. But in Naruto, it burned differently.
It wasn't born of tragedy or responsibility.
It was born of hope.
Zatanna stepped beside him, adjusting her gloves. "So? What do you think?"
Clark didn't answer immediately.
Instead, he looked at Naruto, still grinning, still full of light in a world that wasn't his.
"I think," Clark finally said, "we just found ourselves a new hero."
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Naruto had just finished vaporizing a mountain the size of a small city and was still riding that high when he turned to Zatanna with the eagerness of a kid in a candy shop who had just found the secret menu.
"Zatanna, is there a way for me to learn more skills?" he asked, arms crossed like he meant business. "You've seen my list—it's pretty limited. I think I should at least learn teleportation. It could be useful for escaping bad situations."
Zatanna raised a perfectly sculpted brow, clearly amused. "It's not impossible," she said, her voice laced with mischief, "given your potential."
Naruto's eyes went wide like he'd just found ramen in the desert. "Really?!"
"Yes," she confirmed, before dropping the magical hammer. "But magic isn't just about waving your hands and saying bibbidi-bobbidi-boo. You'll have to study complex arcane theory, spatial equations, advanced sigil geometry—"
Naruto blinked.
"—not to mention understanding the inherent limitations of transdimensional folding and how energy signatures sync with ley lines—"
Naruto slowly blinked again, the light in his eyes flickering like a dying bulb.
"How are your academics?" Zatanna asked sweetly.
Naruto stared at her like she'd just asked him to recite the entire periodic table backward while underwater.
"Shit."
Zatanna sighed like a parent watching their kid try to microwave metal. "That'll take you a few years then."
Naruto clutched his head. "Why is everything that helps you not die so freaking complicated?!"
"Because reality doesn't like being bent," she said cheerfully. "And if you do it wrong, you don't just teleport into a wall—you might teleport into the Sun."
Naruto made a noise that could only be described as a spiritual groan. He looked at his hands, then at the sky, as if pleading to the Sage of Six Paths for a magical shortcut.
"Can't I just—train it? Like chakra? Or punch a portal open or something?"
Zatanna looked genuinely appalled. "Did you just say punch a portal?"
"Hey, I once punched a guy so hard he had a flashback. It's not that far off."
Kara snorted in the background, clearly enjoying the chaos. Clark, ever the composed one, was pretending not to smile.
But Naruto wasn't done brainstorming.
"Wait... Shadow Clones!" he said, snapping his fingers. "I'll just make like a hundred of them and have them study for me!"
Zatanna looked skeptical. "Would that work?"
"Totally. Everything they learn goes back to me when they poof. Boom—instant academic upgrade."
Zatanna raised a hand. "And will they be focused, diligent scholars?"
"Uhhh..."
He remembered that one time he left a group of clones to study a sealing scroll and came back to find them playing poker with frogs.
"...probably not," he admitted.
Zatanna gave him a knowing look, one hand on her hip. "Then you'll have to learn the hard way."
"Ughhhh..."
Naruto flopped backwards onto a rock like it had personally betrayed him. "Why does magic have homework?!"
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Naruto wasn't used to comfort.
Sure, he'd gotten a few heartfelt words from Iruka-sensei back in the day, and Jiraiya had done his whole "tough love" shtick. But real, physical comfort? A gentle hand on the back and a warm smile that said you're not alone in this? That was rarer than Sasuke telling a joke.
So when Kara placed her hand on his back and smiled at him like he wasn't just a shinobi-turned-dimensionally-lost-wanderer, Naruto blinked like she'd handed him a bowl of ramen for free.
"You've got plenty of time to learn," she said gently, giving him a reassuring pat. "So don't rush it and hurt yourself."
Naruto sighed. He wanted to rush. He wanted to teleport yesterday and figure out cosmic secrets before dinner. But... she wasn't wrong. Kara wasn't just powerful—she was wise in her own superpowered way. If she could be patient with herself, he could at least try to be patient with a book or two.
"Besides," Kara added, her grin lighting up like a solar flare, "I gotta admit—your attacks had some real power behind them. I actually felt that punch a little."
Naruto blinked again, this time in stunned silence. "Wait… seriously?"
"Yeah." Kara nodded. "Not as much as Superman would, but you've got a good amount of oomph. Keep training, and who knows?"
Naruto's face broke into a wide grin. His confidence, which had taken a hit after watching Clark casually moon-jog through space, perked up like a puppy hearing the treat bag rustle.
"Hah! Told you I'm awesome," he said, puffing out his chest dramatically.
Zatanna cleared her throat loudly, interrupting the budding ego trip. She clapped her hands together like a teacher about to assign weekend homework.
"Alright, ego-nin," she said. "Time's up. You three need rest. And possibly food. And definitely sleep."
With a flick of her wrist and a whispered incantation that sounded suspiciously like someone sneezing backward, a glowing, swirling portal tore open before them. It looked like a cross between a rainbow smoothie and a black hole with good intentions.
Naruto tilted his head. "That goop leads to the Young Justice place?"
"Headquarters," Zatanna corrected. "Don't call it 'place.' They'll make you clean the bathrooms for that."
Kara laughed and nudged Naruto forward. "C'mon. I'll introduce you to the team. You'll like them—especially Beast Boy. He's loud, annoying, and totally your type."
"Wait—what's my type?" Naruto asked, raising a brow.
"Chaos gremlin energy," Kara replied without hesitation.
Naruto gave her a look. A beat passed. "…You're not wrong."
Zatanna rolled her eyes and gave them a two-finger wave. "Go cause trouble somewhere else, please. I have spells to organize."
The trio stepped through the portal, the magical light wrapping around them like a warm breeze.
As Naruto disappeared into the swirl of color and magic, he glanced back one last time at the wasteland he'd nearly flattened.
He hadn't found his way home yet. But he had found something close.
A new path.
New allies.
And maybe, just maybe...
A new kind of home.