Not a normal one—Lily sloshed all the time. Whether she was hopping into his lap, sliding across the floor to smother him in hugs, or sneakily melting into his laundry pile, she always made a squish-slosh-splat kind of rhythm. But this one was different. It was sluggish. Unsteady.
Mirio looked up from his laptop. "Lily?"
There was a faint gurgling sound from the hallway. He stood and stepped into the kitchen—only to find Lily collapsed against the fridge like a half-deflated water balloon. Her glow was dim, her shape uneven. One boob was melting more than the other. Her tentacle-hair drooped like wilted noodles.
She blinked slowly, eyes a dull teal-green instead of her usual bright blue.
"Urrrrghhh…"
Mirio rushed to her side. "Hey! Lily?! Are you okay?!"
She looked up at him and moaned, her voice slurred. "I feel… bluuuuurp…"
Her body wobbled, then partially collapsed. Her left leg slid across the tile into a puddle, and her arm hung off her side like overcooked pasta. She was barely holding form.
"Lily?! What happened?! Did you absorb something toxic?!"
"I… I don't know…" she whimpered. "I was thirsty, and you were gone, and I wanted something with fizz, and I… I drank the pink bottle in the fridge…"
Mirio blinked. "The what?"
"The pink one…" she murmured, her body rippling like a jello mold thrown into a fan. "It had a unicorn on the label… and little sparkles inside… and it said 'mystery soda'... I think it tasted like burnt candy…"
He froze.
"That stuff expired two years ago!"
She let out a sad blorp. "It's in me…"
He nearly panicked. "Okay, okay. Don't shift. Don't panic. Just—just stay still. I'll call emergency services."
She suddenly gasped, her core pulsing faintly. "But I don't have a mouth! How will I throw up?!"
He grabbed a bowl. "I don't know! Just aim for this and… vent!"
She tried.
Instead, she accidentally ejected a pink foam geyser from her back.
It hit the ceiling.
"AHHH—!"
Mirio ducked as the soda-spray rained down in a sparkling mist. Lily trembled, arms flopping into the bowl instead of her slime.
"I think I'm dying…" she moaned. "Tell the couch I loved it…"
"Don't say that!"
"Tell my yellow jacket to find a good home…"
"You are not dying, you overdramatic goo puddle!"
She let out a pathetic warble and drooped sideways, flattening into a vaguely boob-shaped floor lump.
He crouched beside her and gently touched her glowing core. "Your light's still on… That's good, right?"
"Maybe…" she sniffled. "Maybe it's my ghost light…"
"No ghost talk. Not allowed."
She whimpered and tried to sit up, but her arms turned into noodles again and slipped against his shirt.
"I can't hold form… I'm a disgrace to the squish…"
Mirio thought hard. Her body didn't feel overheated—just unstable. Her glow was off, and her movement sluggish, like she was processing something that didn't agree with her core.
Then it hit him.
"You said it was fizzy."
"Super fizzy…"
"And sparkly."
"Like battery acid but fruity…"
He stared at her. "You're not sick. You're carbonated."
She blinked.
"Hubby… does that mean I'm… fizz slime?"
He sighed and cradled her in his lap, letting her semi-liquid mass mold against his legs like a deflated cuddle blob. "Yes. You're a living soda bubble right now."
She groaned. "Why would humans make that drink?!"
"It was a discontinued gag drink from a novelty store. I forgot we still had one in the fridge. I thought it got tossed out with the haunted cheese."
She gasped. "There was haunted cheese?!"
"Focus, Lily."
He helped prop her up, her goo oozing around his arms like a lazy scarf. "How do I… de-bubble?"
"Water," he said. "Lots of it. You need to flush the soda from your body and stabilize your core."
She groaned. "That means I have to pee it out…"
"You don't pee."
"I emotionally pee…"
He dragged her gently into the bathroom and ran the tub. As the cold water filled, he eased her into it, letting her dissolve slightly into the clean liquid.
She sighed with relief. "Ooooohhhh… my cells feel… less angry…"
"Good," he said, kneeling beside the tub. "Let it soak through you."
Her shape stabilized gradually. Her glow returned to its soft blue hue. Her breasts reformed into their usual symmetrical bounciness, and her tentacle-hair perked up slightly like hydrated noodles.
Mirio reached into the tub and gave her core a gentle squeeze. "Feeling better?"
She smiled, her body swirling around his wrist. "Hubby saved me…"
"You poisoned yourself with off-brand soda."
"I was trying to be sparkly and cute~"
"You became gassy and half-dead."
"Still cute?"
"…Yeah. Still cute."
She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a full slime hug, water sloshing everywhere.
"You're not mad I melted on the floor?"
"I'm just glad it wasn't the haunted cheese."
She giggled weakly. "If I ever die again, make sure I sparkle."
"You're not allowed to die. Not even from soda."
"Yes, hubby~"
Later that night, after three bowls of filtered water and a long nap curled around his torso, Lily re-solidified on the couch with a quiet burp.
"Still fizzy."
"Still alive."
She smiled.
"Still yours."