Chapter 22: Crossroads
Spring hadn't fully arrived, but New York was beginning to thaw.
The snow on the sidewalks had melted into puddles, and the air no longer bit at Emma's cheeks. Tulips peeked out from city gardens, stubborn and soft — much like how she was starting to feel again.
In the quiet moments between classes and gallery prep, Emma often found herself thinking about Jake. Not in the heavy, aching way she had in the beginning. But in a way that felt like tracing the edges of an old photograph.
She still loved him.
But she was starting to wonder if love alone was enough.
---
Lucas had become a steady presence. Not loud, not demanding. Just there. He brought her tea when she forgot to eat, left tiny sketches in her notebook, and once painted the inside of her umbrella with a tiny galaxy so she could carry the stars even on rainy days.
But still… Emma held back.
There were glances. Almost-kisses. Moments where she could feel something flickering between them, like a match waiting to be struck.
But she hadn't lit it. Not yet.
Maybe because part of her heart was still somewhere between who she used to be… and who she was becoming.
---
On a Friday night, Emma received a text from Jake.
Jake: "Thinking about visiting. Would that be okay?"
She stared at the message for a long time.
There was a time she would've replied in two seconds flat.
But now?
Now, she didn't know what answer would feel right.
Emma: "Can I be honest?"
Jake: "Always."
Emma: "I'm not sure what seeing you would do to me. Or to us. Things feel… different now."
Jake: "Yeah. They do. But I miss you, Em."
Emma: "I miss you too. Let me think about it?"
Jake: "Of course. No pressure."
She stared at his name long after the conversation ended, heart buzzing with confusion. Because she did want to see him. And yet, she was terrified of what it might mean — what it might undo.
---
Two days later, she and Lucas were at a small outdoor market, browsing through vintage books and handmade jewelry. The sun was soft above them, and laughter rose from the nearby food stalls.
He handed her a bracelet — simple, silver, with a tiny moon charm.
"It reminded me of you," he said.
Emma smiled faintly. "Because I'm pale and moody?"
Lucas chuckled. "Because you glow in the dark."
She blushed. "You're ridiculous."
"And yet, you keep showing up," he said, gently. "What does that mean?"
She looked at him, eyes flickering with emotion. "It means… I'm figuring things out. Still healing. Still holding on to something that used to be everything."
Lucas didn't look away. "I don't want to rush you, Emma. I just… need to know if there's a chance."
Her throat tightened. "There is. But I won't lie — part of me still belongs to someone else."
"I can live with that," Lucas said. "As long as the rest of you is still choosing to be here."
She didn't answer with words. Just reached out and gently took his hand.
---
That night, she opened her sketchbook and drew two figures walking separate paths — one holding a compass, the other holding a flame. Their roads didn't intersect. But their shadows touched.
She titled it: "When We Were Everything."
---
The following week, Jake showed up.
Unannounced.
Emma stepped out of the gallery and there he was, leaning against the brick wall, hands in his jacket pockets.
She froze.
He looked older. More grounded. Like someone who'd made peace with something painful.
"I was nearby for a friend's wedding," he explained. "I thought… if I didn't see you, I'd regret it."
Emma nodded slowly. "I'm glad you came."
They walked in silence for a while. Side by side. The way they used to.
Finally, Jake stopped near the edge of a park. The sun was setting, golden light spilling over the grass.
"I don't expect anything," he said quietly. "I just needed to see you with my own eyes. To know you're okay."
Emma's voice cracked. "I am. I think… I really am."
Jake smiled, sad and proud. "You're shining, Em. And I don't want to be the reason you dim."
Her eyes welled. "You were never the reason I dimmed. I just didn't know how to grow."
They stood there, hearts thudding, breathing the same air.
Jake reached into his coat and handed her something.
His compass.
"I think you don't need this anymore," he said. "But I'd like you to have it anyway."
Emma clutched it in her palm, a tear slipping down her cheek. "Thank you. For everything."
Jake leaned in, kissed her forehead — soft, reverent. "You'll always be my first real love."
She whispered back, "And you'll always be my most important goodbye."
---
He left that night.
No big scene. No dramatic ending.
Just a boy and a girl, once everything to each other, now brave enough to let go.
---
Lucas found her sitting on the rooftop the next evening, the compass in her lap.
"Was it hard?" he asked.
Emma nodded. "Yeah. But also… right."
Lucas didn't say anything. Just sat beside her and laced their fingers together.
This time, she didn't pull away.
Because for the first time in a long time, Emma wasn't caught between past and future.
She was exactly where she was meant to be.