Our footsteps echoed muffled through the increasingly dense dust as we moved away from the city center. The surrounding buildings seemed to fade, swallowed by a pale mist of abandonment. There was no longer the warm glow of bustling taverns, nor the incessant hum of the shops in the lower city. The sound of urban life dissolved behind us, while ahead, the colossal walls of Orario began to rise on the horizon.
Astraea walked ahead, guiding me with her hand intertwined in mine; neither of us spoke much. Finally, after long minutes of walking, we stopped before a modest building: a small wooden and stone cottage resting on the forgotten edges of the labyrinthine city. The once bright paint on the walls had faded over time, giving way to a grayish, dull tone. When the goddess pushed the door, it creaked softly.
**
"This is our home.", said the goddess, releasing my hand to open the entrance.
I paused for a moment on the threshold, observing the interior slowly revealed as Astraea lit some candles. The space was simple: a main room integrated with the kitchen, and at the back, two doors likely leading to a bedroom and a bathroom, along with worn furniture and minimalist household utensils. There was no luxury nor obvious signs of excessive comfort — just the essentials.
Still, the environment clearly showed it was well cared for. Despite the worn appearance and somewhat heavy atmosphere, there was none of what one might expect from such a place: no visible dirt, mold, or cobwebs. On the contrary, it was clear that the house was tended to with care, which drew a genuine look of admiration from me.
"I'm sorry…", said Astraea, with a somewhat embarrassed smile. "I imagine this isn't the grand place you dreamed of living in when you came to Orario."
As soon as I understood what she meant, I shook my head quickly, eager to clear up any misunderstanding before it was too late. I stepped forward, raising my hands in an almost childish pleading gesture, and spoke hurriedly.
"No… it's nothing like that!", I replied, taking a deep breath afterward, trying to sound composed. "I mean… I'm not bothered. I've always lived in simple homes, so this place is far from a problem. In fact, I was charmed by how well it's cared for!"
My eyes searched hers urgently, longing for some confirmation that my words had been understood the right way. To my relief, I saw Astraea relax. Realizing that, I felt a wave of calm wash over me. The misunderstanding, if there was one, had been left behind.
"So that's it?", she said, smiling softly. "Thank you. I'm relieved to know you feel that way."
Approaching the stove with calm steps, she continued.
"You must be exhausted… would you like something to eat? I can make a stew, I just need a little time to heat the water."
As she reached the center of the room, I was about to say that such hospitality wasn't necessary. However, the mere mention of food awakened a dormant monster in my stomach. As if waking from an ancient slumber, it roared with a fierce, guttural growl that echoed throughout the entire house.
I felt my body falter mid-movement, as if all the energy had drained away and gone to my cheeks. A sudden heat rose to my face, burning in a blush that betrayed the shame that enveloped me entirely. Instinctively, I brought my hands to my face, trying—in vain—to hide my expression.
Astraea let out a warm laugh, elegantly bringing her hand to her mouth to stifle it before gracefully turning back toward the stove.
"Fufufu… I'll heat the water. How about taking a bath while you wait?"
I only nodded, too embarrassed to even argue.
**
The bathroom, like every room in the house, was small and lined with worn wood and cold stones that seemed shaped more by time than by any human hand. A crooked copper mirror hung above a narrow shelf, stained with rust in some spots, yet still capable of reflecting a faint but vivid image. In the corner, there were some wooden basins — a smaller one with handmade soap and another with room-temperature water that Astraea had placed there well before I entered.
I crouched before one of the basins, dipping my hands up to my wrists. The water covered my skin with a brief, invigorating chill. I began the bath by washing my arms, moving carefully. Then, I rinsed the rest of my body gently, mindful not to soil myself again while reaching other parts.
The strange and almost alien experience of seeing my naked body for the first time in this world made my mind drift between deep thoughts. Unable to resist the temptation, I glanced at the mirror and, the moment I did, I had to stifle a sigh threatening to escape my lips.
The image that returned my gaze was a living painting — a girl with angelic features, doll-like skin, almost translucent, and eyes as green as freshly cut emeralds. Her straight hair, a bright shade of red, was slightly stuck to her shoulders by water droplets that had fallen on them. Her nose was fine, slightly upturned, her mouth small and full. And even without makeup and tired, her expression carried a beauty impossible to ignore.
She was beautiful. Ridiculously beautiful. Like a sculpture carved piece by piece, meticulously polished and assembled until it formed something transcending the ordinary. She was not the Helena I was used to seeing.
I touched my own cheek with wet fingers, feeling the softness of the face rounded by youth. Her silhouette was small, with visible childish traits, the nonexistent curves only suggested by the contour of the skin. Baby fat still rested on the hips, thighs, and slender arms. She seemed to be... twelve, thirteen years old? Maybe younger?
I had already imagined I wouldn't see the woman I was before anymore, but the shock still hit me hard. That person could be anyone, but not the Helena with wavy black hair, common brown eyes, and the body of a young adult teenager. She had completely disappeared. In her place remained a girl too beautiful, too young, too pure, too innocent... And I saw myself as an intruder, occupying a body that was not mine.
What life had that person lived before... me?
Was it a cruel exchange? And if… she had been lost in the flames instead of me? If the price of my second chance was the end of her only one? This idea gnawed at me like a poisoned thorn, as absurd as it was painfully plausible. And then, without warning or permission, I took what was left of her… like a life thief, a miserable and thankful parasite.
"This is not my body…", I repeated to myself, as if confessing a sin.
But even if it was fair to blame myself for this, what could I really do to change the situation? Could I simply choose: "No, I don't want to inhabit this body, so take me back to my land, God"? Obviously not. So, what would be the point of despising myself? I had to be sensible. All that was left, painfully, was to move forward and live life with dignity — different from how I had before. To enjoy it, this time, for myself and for that red-haired girl who was now absent.
Knock, knock.
The knock on the door pulled me out of the spiral of thoughts. On the other side, Astraea's voice came softly.
"Excuse me? I'm leaving a clean towel here and some clothes. They're folded next to the door. Oh… and dinner is ready too. No need to hurry, I just wanted you to know."
I shook off the daydreams and, with renewed effort, finally removed the thorn that stubbornly pierced my mind, discarding it. I stood up slowly, took a deep breath, and headed for the door. I opened just enough to extend my arm and grab the coarse fabric towel, along with the loose, comfortable cotton clothes left there with a calm smile.
**
With the bath finished, I was drawn to the living room by the seductive, earthy aroma that filled the air. The warm scent of a stew, made with roots slowly simmered in a thick broth, enveloped the space. There was a slight sweetness in the soft potatoes and carrots, a pungent, rustic touch from the fresh herbs, and a woody note, certainly coming from sturdier roots like turnip or burdock.
"Ah, the clothes are a bit loose... we can go buy some that fit you later. Use these for now.", Astraea said, placing two ceramic bowls—one with an old chip on its rim, both well-filled—on the wooden table.
The familiar scene touched my heart with unexpected intensity. I hurried to sit, eyes fixed on the bowl before me. The broth still released steam, a sign it was piping hot... but even if it burned my mouth, I knew that, seasoned by my hunger, it would be the best meal of my life.
"Eat, it'll warm your stomach.", Astraea encouraged, sitting down as well.
"Okay…", I murmured, carefully picking up the spoon and bringing the first sip to my lips.
The warmth traveled down my throat, heating my chest in a way that felt different from usual. Unable to hold back, I let out a soft moan of satisfaction.
Astraea smiled, discreetly watching my reactions with an air of contentment, while also taking spoonfuls herself.
I ate quickly, with a voracious appetite. With every bite, I felt the weight of exhaustion on my shoulders dissolve a little more. When I noticed my bowl was almost empty, I timidly raised my eyes and met Astraea's serene gaze fixed on me.
"Would you like some more?", the goddess asked gently, tilting her head slightly as her chestnut-hazel hair slipped down the side of her face.
My eyes widened, mildly surprised, while a sparkle lit up my gaze. Instinctively, my hands gripped the edge of the bowl.
"Can I… really?"
Astraea let out a low, genuine laugh before standing up and, delicately, taking the bowl from my hands. She walked to the stove, where the pot still emitted steam, and with skilled movements, took the ladle to serve more.
"I'd be devastated if my only child couldn't eat until her belly was full.", she said, looking over her shoulder and flashing a playful smile.
My cheeks warmed instantly—something that, to my dismay, was becoming quite frequent. Still, I couldn't say I hated that feeling. Her words kept echoing inside me for a long time, resonating with tenderness and a subtle weight I still couldn't name. I remained silent, watching as Astraea served another portion, gathering the remaining thick broth and generous chunks of roots.
**
I rinsed my fingers in the warm, cloudy water of the basin as I leaned over to grab the last ceramic bowl. Astraea had hesitated to let me wash the dishes, but I insisted — it was the least I could do. A simple gesture, yes, but one that allowed me to contribute in some way. At least then, the feeling of uselessness would briefly retreat.
I dipped the bowl one last time in the second basin, where the water still held some clarity, though it had already lost the clear tone it had at the start. I shook off the excess drops and placed it next to the others, on a linen cloth spread over the little table by the window. There, I left them to air dry, wrapped in the fresh breeze coming through the crack.
I ran my hands over my hips, drying my damp palms on the fabric of my clothes, and took a deep breath. For a moment, I just watched the result of that small effort: everything clean, aligned, in order. A modest accomplishment, perhaps, but it sparked in me the feeling of a job well done.
Finished with the washing, I looked away a few times, hesitant, before finally summoning the courage to face Astraea. Questions had been piling up since earlier, pushed to the back of my mind out of convenience or fear. Now, however, they weighed too much to be ignored. I needed to understand the words of that woman with pointed ears... what the man beside her had said... even the baker's remarks. Everything revolved around concepts that still escaped me. So, I started with the questions I thought were easiest.
"Um... how should I refer to you?", I asked the goddess sitting peacefully in the chair.
"You can call me 'Astraea.'", she answered naturally, without needing to think much. "Or whatever feels more comfortable for you. I'm not a rigid goddess."
Her answer was gentle, which made me remain unsure about the most appropriate way to address her. "Goddess" sounded too formal and distant, something I suspected she wouldn't like. On the other hand, calling her just by name sounded too intimate, and "mother"... I would never dare.
"So… Lady Astraea?", I ventured, raising my eyes to look for some reaction. When I noticed she accepted it, I breathed deeply and continued: "What is the Dungeon?"
She slightly lowered her head, as if trying to find the simplest way to explain something complex to a child.
"The Dungeon is alive," she began, clasping her hands in her lap. "It constantly generates monsters, as if it had a will of its own. Each floor holds new dangers, stronger creatures, more ingenious traps. But there are also rewards like magic crystals, rare materials... that's why so many adventurers risk their lives inside."
"The people wandering around with weapons… are they the adventurers?", I asked, already imagining her answer.
"Yes," Astraea replied with a slight nod. "Orario is known as the city of adventurers because it houses the entrance to the Dungeon. It's where they gather, train, and set out in search of glory and riches…"
"And the Falna, what is it?"
"Falna is the blessing we grant to our children. It's the bond that connects a deity to mortals of the lower world; that's how we make them part of our familia.", she paused briefly, making sure I was following before continuing. "With this blessing, you can grow stronger and surpass the natural limits of existence. Are you understanding?"
"I think so... does everyone here have it?", I asked, still somewhat shocked, trying to absorb the meaning of it all.
"Not everyone," the goddess replied, shaking her head in negation. "But Falna is a requirement from the guild to become an adventurer."
"But if so many people receive this Falna, what happens if it's given to someone bad?"
Astraea's expression hardened, stiffening before she answered.
"Not all gods are good people. Some are evil by nature or simply see mortals as toys they can play with at will."
She sighed, her voice heavy with restrained sorrow.
"It's sad, but Falna falling into the wrong hands is not rare. Fortunately, there are more good or indifferent gods than bad ones.", Astraea continued, her expression hardened. "But since Orario lost its most powerful pillars a few years ago, things have gradually worsened."
I felt a bitter taste in my mouth as Astraea finished speaking. It wasn't as if she had told me unimaginable secrets, things I would never have thought of.
What repulsed me was not the information itself, but how real it sounded. What if those bad people organized? What if they united under the symbol of one of those gods to spread pain, chaos, and destruction? I couldn't help but shiver at the thought.
Perhaps the true nightmare of this world wasn't just facing monsters in the depths of a dungeon, though that alone was terrifying. It was knowing that there were humans blessed, empowered, capable of slaughtering with a smile on their faces. That this power was granted to them by the gods themselves and no one seemed willing or able to stop them.
I turned my gaze back to Astraea. She remained seated, serene, her eyes downcast, lost in silent thoughts about her own words. There was something moving about her figure — a goddess so wonderful, who would never raise a hand against another, even when confronted by the most blatant injustice.
She offered food, shelter, and comfort with nothing expected in return. Living alone in this forgotten corner of the city, wrapped in mystery and kindness, her presence carried an unmatched magnetism, yes, but with a delicacy bordering on fragile.
That caused sharp pangs of despair in me. What if someone walked through that door now, with dark intentions? What if an unimaginable catastrophe suddenly struck us? What could I do to protect her? Throw myself between her and danger? Face the enemy with my childish, empty fists?
Just like in the past, I would be only a powerless bystander, or at least, that's how it seemed at first glance.
"Just a bystander?"
No... something about that idea was wrong. Astraea, for sure, would do everything in her power to protect me. She was that kind of person, someone who would take the front line without hesitation. Actually, I was the one to be protected.
That thought made me boil inside. The heat rising to my face was one of burning indignation, stronger than any fire.
She had welcomed me. Treated me kindly. Looked at me as if I had some worth — even when I no longer saw any. There was a light in her so pure it awakened, inside me, an almost desperate desire to return that glow.
Maybe I was being irrational, but it didn't matter. I'd known this goddess for only a few hours, and yet she had already planted something in me — something that pulsed too strongly to be ignored. Maybe it was love... not romantic love, but a different kind of love. Instantaneous. Deep. A rare and precious kind.
This house, this home, this peace that Astraea had built... all of it was worth protecting.
And, if necessary, I would fight for it.
"Lady Astraea...", my voice came out firm, firmer than I expected. "Please… give me a Falna!"
The beautiful goddess gave me a serious look. An unusual expression on her usually calm and playful face. That change shattered any illusion that she was only lightness and sweetness.
"Are you sure?", she asked, her voice more challenging than usual. "I told you I would give you a place in my Familia, and I intend to keep that promise, but I need to be honest."
She paused briefly, her eyes searching mine as if inviting me to back down.
"My wish is to make Orario a better place and, as selfish as that may sound, it means those by my side will have a tortuous path ahead. You would be my first child, and because of that, you would face even more obstacles than normal. I won't judge you if you change your mind after knowing this."
For a moment, I froze before the immensity of the choice imposed on me. But then I took a deep breath, stepped forward, and knelt before her. I held her hands firmly — I wanted her to feel my presence, to know without any doubt that I was there. That I had chosen to stand by her side, just as she had earlier chosen to stand by mine.
"I'm kind of a cowardly girl," I confessed, with a shy smile. "That's why it has to be you. I can't do most things others do without a strong reason... but if it's for you, Lady Astraea... it'll be worth risking."
Astraea's expression softened, and I slowly released her hands as she stood up.
"Sit down and lift your shirt.", she ordered gently.
I didn't understand right away why she asked that, but she wouldn't have asked for no reason. I silently nodded and obeyed, sitting while she moved toward the kitchen, returning moments later with a bread knife in her hands.
"I'll ask only one more time," she said, stopping in front of me. "After this, it will be hard to turn back. Aren't you afraid?"
I swallowed hard, feeling my fingers tremble, but answered with the honesty I had left.
"Yes, I am…" I said, my body shaking. "But I have no doubt I would regret forever if I gave up being here."
Astraea nodded, went around to my back, and crouched, aligning herself with my height. Then, she lightly cut her own finger with the knife, and blood slowly trickled out. She then traced the bloody finger along my bare back, drawing a red line that, as it extended, began to glow with a bluish-white light.
It didn't hurt. No sting, no burn. Just a light tickling sensation, like she was drawing something with the back of an enchanted feather.
"You are the bravest girl I have ever met. I couldn't ask for a better child."
I shook my head, a little embarrassed.
"I'm not as brave as you think… I'm trembling just imagining what's ahead."
"You're wrong. The bravest steps are taken with trembling legs," she said as she continued the divine trace. "That's exactly why they're so special."
While she etched her words into me, I didn't feel any noticeable physical change. No new strength coursed through my veins, no hidden power suddenly awakened. A few seconds later, her touch withdrew, as silently as it had come.
"It's done," she said, wrapping her arms around my shoulders and resting her chin atop my head. "Now you are part of my Familia."
She hugged me like someone who truly cared.
"We'll keep taking care of each other from now on, Alise."
Alise?
She didn't call me Helena.
Is this the real owner of this body's name? It must be. If not, whose else would it be?
I paused to reflect. Would Alise approve of my choice? Would she understand? I don't know and probably never will. Maybe that thought is hypocritical, maybe even unfair, but even so, I felt a sincere desire to carry her name while I live. Taking it for myself would mean fully assuming the life she left behind, and with it, another sin added to my list of condemnations.
But forgetting her… that would be unforgivable.
I want to keep her name alive — honor it, not erase it. Even if now it's me inhabiting this body, even if another soul walks in her flesh… still, I want her to continue existing through me. Even if only symbolically.
"I feel the same, Lady Astraea."
And to you, Alise, I give my thanks. From the bottom of my heart, I am deeply grateful.