"And you must be Mr. Noodles," I said to the boa constrictor basking in the sun at the top of a tree. "Now come on, Lily's mad worried about you."
I gently picked up the twelve-foot snake. He didn't resist—quite the opposite, really. He wrapped around me like I was the comfiest rock he'd ever found.
Descending slowly so I wouldn't startle him, I soon landed in front of a girl, maybe ten years old, holding a leash. The way her hazel eyes lit up when she saw me gave me more energy than the sun ever could. If I'm not careful, those eyes might just become my one true weakness.
"Here you go—safe and sound," I said, handing over Mr. Noodles. He was actually a bit reluctant to let go, poor thing.
"Thank you, Mister Vanguard," she said adorably, offering me a flower she must've found. "Here, for saving Mr. Noodles."
"Why, thank you," I replied with a smile, accepting the flower like it was a priceless treasure. "I'll plant it in my garden—it'll make it even more beautiful."
With care, I placed it into a sealed chamber, then shrank it down to fit in my utility belt.
After making sure she was safe with her parents, I took off. Didn't want to get swarmed and held there longer than necessary. I shot up past the clouds—high enough to avoid another awkward midair encounter with a plane.
Breathing in the Earth's air like it was the finest thing I'd ever smelled, I couldn't help but smile. If you need me to spell it out for you: I love this planet.
Everything about it teeters on the edge of chaos—and yet, somehow, it all works out. Even before I started wearing my underwear over my pants. It's a resilient place, full of resilient people. Just thinking about what they're capable of warms my soul.
That is, as long as someone keeps the bad apples out of the bunch. Most of the time, that someone is yours truly—but I digress.
Anyway—up, up, and away to Japan. Time to deal with a Kaiju.
See you next time, Uatu. And readers.