"Darkness. All around me. Am I falling? Floating? Being squeezed through a blender? What the hell is going on?"
That was the last coherent thought Kim Shin managed before his entire existence was overtaken by a crushing pressure—followed by blinding light, wailing noises, and a very real sense of being manhandled like a slimy meatball.
His senses were slowly returning.
There was shouting. Crying. A woman's labored breathing. A man's trembling voice. And then...
"Congratulations! It's a boy!"
A frail old voice said it with a crackling warmth—likely a midwife. Kim Shin, now very much not in his thirty-year-old body anymore, let out a scream. Not because he wanted to, but because being born freaking HURTS.
"We did it, darling… we're parents!"
"I'm a father… He's perfect…"
The parents hugged, tears flowing freely, the moment clearly touching and emotional.
Kim Shin, meanwhile, was still soaking in birth goo and crying his tiny soul out.
"I'm sorry, do you not see the naked baby you just yanked out into this freezing world?! Hello?! I just got isekai'd through a birth canal and you're out here celebrating like you won the lottery!"
He opened his eyes—barely. Everything was blurry and painful, but he could make out silhouettes. A woman lying on a pile of hay and cloth. A man in travel-worn robes with a sword at his side. And a third woman, likely the maid, wiping sweat from the mother's brow.
"Looks like I've been reborn into a murim-style family," he thought, still mentally recovering from being forcibly yeeted into a new life.
But something didn't add up.
The floor was shaking. The ceiling above him creaked. Outside, hooves pounded.
"Wait… is this… a moving cart? You gave birth on a freaking HORSE CART?!"
That realization hit harder than the slap he never got at birth.
"Honey…" his mother's voice was soft but anxious. "Was it really necessary to flee like this? We could've waited just one more day. What if something had gone wrong?"
"We had no choice," the man replied—his father, apparently. "When people like us—small merchant families—offend a martial sect, we either kneel… or run. I chose to run."
The maid, Ah Ruo, cut in nervously.
"Master… Mistress… if they're still chasing us, we're all dead."
"They will chase us," his father said grimly. "That's why we're heading to the Imperial Capital. No sect would dare touch us under the eyes of the Azure Empire's law. Not unless they're suicidal."
Kim Shin's baby-sized brain was already working overtime.
"So we're on the run. From a sect. And judging by the timeline, terrain, and the few sects near the capital, it's probably… the Black Boar Sect."
He sighed mentally.
"I just got born and I'm already in someone else's plotline."
They eventually approached the city walls.
And not just any walls—massive, towering stone fortifications that looked like they could survive a demon horde and still stand proud. The kind of walls that screamed, We're rich, powerful, and have taxes to prove it.
A lazy guard stood at the gate, half-eaten bun in hand, his belly hanging over his belt and a look of pure disinterest plastered on his face.
"State your name, background, reason for entering, and do it quickly," the guard said, not even looking up.
His father smiled awkwardly and handed him a small pouch.
"Esteemed officer, how could nobodies like us be worthy of sharing our unimportant names with someone so magnificent?"
The guard peeked inside the pouch—his eyes glinted with recognition. Likely a bribe.
"Hmm. Yes, yes. You're right. You may pass."
Kim Shin's face twitched.
"Corruption level: Classic cultivation setting. Yep, I'm definitely in the right world."
As their cart rolled into the heart of the empire, the outer slums gave way to wide marble-paved roads, merchant stalls covered in silks, and towers that reached toward the clouds like the fingers of gods.
There were men in robes flying overhead on swords, spiritual beasts chained as pets, and nobles in flashy robes waving paper fans like they owned the air itself.
Kim Shin, still cradled in the maid's arms, couldn't help but mutter his first real thought upon entering the capital:
"Holy. Shit."