It had been over a year since the accident. Something that should have been a miracle, seemed to be the marker of nothing but bad luck in my life.
Mom didn't get the job she had the interview for because she never made it to the interview that day.
Instead, she ended up getting another job after I recovered, and she really excelled. Except now that she'd received a huge promotion, she was almost never home.
Dad too. I hardly saw either of them anymore.
I almost always missed their calls so I pretty much only heard their voices through voice mails it seemed. Our interactions had practically been diminished to nothing but texts.
We moved houses to one smaller, but closer to my mom's work and we had to get rid of a lot of our things to downsize.
Even on my birthday, they just left gifts for me outside my bedroom door.
"I love and miss you so much baby. I hope to see you soon." And "To my precious daughter, I think about you every day. There's not a moment you are not on my mind. Happy Birthday." Their cards read.
The gifts they got me were everything I'd wanted. A new plushie from the brand I followed, which had been keeping me company while they were busy, a necklace with my zodiac sign on it and a big bouquet of Lilies – my favorite.
It was weird, after the accident, I wanted nothing more than to be with my parents. I didn't want to leave their side and yet now I felt farther away from them than ever.
They'd get home too late and I'd already be asleep. Sometimes I'd hear their voices whispering quietly as they went up to bed.
Part of me felt like I was beginning to resent them.
I was in a terrible accident! They cried so much! They worried so much! They should be showering me with love and affection right now and yet I felt the least loved in my whole entire life!
I shook my head.
May 2 was just like any other day, and yet it turned out to be one of the scariest and most fearful of my family's lives. Maybe…..this big change in routine made them feel safer. Maybe by making the days different than before, it would never repeat.
That's what I hoped at least.
Life outside of my family hasn't been so great either.
Having to move away from my friends, I had to start all over at a new school and it felt like everyone hated me here.
Only my best friend Maddie even sent me texts to check up on me, but they slowly stopped coming after a while.
I guess that's to be expected. It's hard to have long distance relationships.
"Okay! Everyone! It's time to pay attention!" My teacher yelled, yanking me out of my thoughts.
TICK!
I winced. Something hit my head. I turned around the see the girl behind me snickering.
I rubbed the back of my head and faced the teacher again, trying to pay attention.
TICK!
I winced again.
A ball of paper plopped to the ground and rolled towards the middle of the row.
I raised my hand and the girl just snickered more. She shoved her foot into my book holder that was attached to my seat underneath, propelling my desk forward and shoving my stomach into the hard wooden edge.
"AH-!" I groaned and rubbed my rib cage and stomach. I whipped my head around and shot her a glare, as I raised my hand again.
The teacher ignored me, so I waved it in the air as the girl tossed another paper ball at me.
Nothing.
"HELLO?!" I called out, annoyed.
Everyone jumped and gasped at the sudden outburst, their eyes turning towards me with shock and surprise.
"Whoever that was, don't interrupt me or I'll send you to the principle's office!"
Defeated, I put my hand down. Tears threatened to erupt from my eyes as a pen hit the back of my head.
So, what? I just have to sit here and take it?
When class finished, I hurried out of the door with the crowd of students trying to make it to their next class.
Somehow, despite moving with the wave of people, the girl that had been bothering me, still managed to shove me and send me tumbling over.
My knee hit the concrete with a loud 'THUD' and my hand scraped against the rough surface, causing blood to prickle my skin.
"OW! What was that for?!" I yelled, rolling onto my butt to look up at her.
"What was what for?" She laughed, a crooked smile appearing on her face.
"You just pushed me!" I stood up and dusted my hands off on my skirt before checking my knee. There was no blood, but it was certainly going to be bruised tomorrow.
"Who me? Are you accusing me of something right now? Do you think I don't have anything better to do than shove you? You clearly just lost your balance with the crowd. Maybe pay more attention next time~" She cooed as she shoved past me, causing my body to twist.
She wasn't the only one either. Most off my classmates treated me like she did or they completely ignored me.
In my next class our teacher told us to come together in groups of four or less and work on our assignment.
I watched as everyone grouped together, even the shy kids were being asked to be in groups.
"Hey," I tapped the shoulder of the guy in front of me, "hey can I be in your group?"
He didn't even turn around to look at me, he just twisted his shoulder as if to bat me away like I was some kind of bug that was irritating him.
I looked around the room and got up, quietly walking over to a group of 3.
"Hi, can I be in your group?"
Like he did, they just ignored me.
I bit my lip as I looked around the classroom, a hard lump forming as tears filled my eyes.
Maybe the teacher could manually assign me. I approached his desk.
"Excuse me? I ca-"
"AND IF YOU DON'T JOIN A GROUP YOU'LL FAIL THE ASSIGNMENT! I'M NOT GONNA HOLD YOUR HANDS YOU HAVE TO FIND A GROUP YOURSELF!" She yelled over me.
I puckered my lips as I slowly blew air through them, trying my best not to burst into tears right then and there.
I wouldn't say I was popular at my old school, but I certainly was never treated to this degree.
When I got home, to my empty house, I burst into tears. The dejection and isolation of the day completely taking over.
I sat on my bed and squeezed the plushie my parents had got me as tight as I could as I called my mom.
RING. RING. RING. RING.
"I'm sorry the number you have reached is not availa-" I hung up as tears streamed down my face.
I tried a few more times only to be faced with the same result.
"Mom, please pick up. Can you come home? Please come home early. I really need you. Everyone's been so mean to me today, please come home, I need a hug. I really need a hug so bad, please." I begged her through text.
She must've been in a meeting or something because she didn't text me back.
I tried my best to stay awake, hoping I could catch her as she came home. I even curled up in their bed. I needed my parents. I needed my mom.
I must've drifted into a deep sleep, the day exhausting me, because by the time I woke up it was already the next morning and my parents had left for work already.